Wild fire spreading rapidly like rumors around school.
Tears pouring like an aggressive thunderstorm.
You’re too busy to clean, anger adding up like the mess in your locker.
Feelings getting crushed like the chips that ended up under your feet.
Friends being lost like that one speck of grass you
tried to keep your eyes on.
Enemies being gained like rain drops hitting the window.
Backs being stabbed to make it feel like you didn’t have a
spine at all.
Finally it all boils down like the water on the stove you
forgot all about.
Life finally feels like you’re floating on clouds.
You’re finally as happy as a little kid at the park.
Hey! You up there!!
I’ve got some questions.
What The Hell have you done?
Now I understand the animals,
I can live with that
But human? Oh don’t get me started.
From loud talking
To common destruction upon each other
There isn’t any room left for peace.
They even want my fur and no one touches fur.
They just won’t let us be!
I wish you would take them back.
I mean think about it.
Were these your intentions?
Cuz if I were you, they’d all be gone.
But that all falls in place with my master plan.
Oh . . . Ya know what you should do?
Pur me as your right hand man . . .
Then we would RULE the world.
Yea, lions and friends.
Pretty catchy right?
That could really work . . .
Hmm. I’ll give you some time to think about it.
Oh man – _ –
They’re back at it again.
And only you know how they can get.
But before I go, I was thinking,
After they’re gone,
What if we create another ‘human-like’
thing?
And they can be tall
and smart
and cin gone’s.
Oh boy, looks like my time
is up.
but I doubt you were listening anyway
If you were even awake.
There are many types of men.
There are the types of men that cheat.
The types of men that lie.
The types of men that steal, kill,
and destroy.
There are the heartbreaks,
The types of men that abuse you.
The types of men that sleep with
you and leave you.
The types of men who try to control you.
The types of men that tell you you’re beautiful,
then they hurt you. Then, there are the types
of men that will touch you without asking.
There’s only one type of man I want.
The man that doesn’t try to change
who I am, The man who will love me for
my intelligence and my personality, and not
for my body.
I want the type of man that if I gave
him my heart he will give me his.
I want a man who can stop trying
to be ‘THE’ man and become a
man.
I want a man who won’t lie, cheat,
steal double cross, hurt, abuse,
or leave me.
But that man is only 1 in a million.
There are many types of men, but the
only type of man I want is
The Right One.
In other news, Afghanistan
has advanced stink bombs, Fart
grenades, and a very powerful toilet,
plus a giant plunger and two of the
world’s famous plumbers.
So why don’t they have a giant
sink or a giant bar of soap?
As we all know, Osama Bin Laden
poops and farts like everyone else.
So why is he different?
Everyone in America has been
asking this question for years,
Now they’ve finally figured it
out.
No wonder our sewers in
America smell like 100th degree
murder in diarrhea.
No wonder Lady Gaga made
a meat dress.
No wonder celebrities sell
so many perfumes and
colognes.
Now Americans know why
these psychotic things
occur every day.
It’s all because Osama Bin Laden
flushes the toilet and doesn’t wash his hands.