Exclusive Ink

Tag: paula

  • THE FOG

    by PAULA

    I ain’t done much of this before
    Being a kid and all, not much
    Experience.
    But, I got a whole life to live
    In front of me.
    Taking the path less traveled is no
    Option
    Because I’m not going to be a mere
    Shadow of someone else.
    I’m gonna make my own footprints,
    Make my own memories.
    If I expect to be anything other
    Than a splash of paint on
    My canvas.
    If I expect to make it in this world,
    I gotta be the best.
    So when the world puts it
    To the test
    I’m gonna give it my all.
    Forget being afraid to fall.
    Cause ain’t no one gonna push
    Me down.
    I’ll crash to one knee
    But my head will never hit the
    Ground.
    I’m higher than the statue of
    Liberty
    But I don’t got my head in
    The clouds.
    I’m looking straight into the
    Eyes of my future
    And I’m not backing down.
    And I’m not rapping.
    These gangsters out here trapping
    Through the night while I’m
    Getting my rest.
    Ain’t nothing wrong with doing what
    You gotta do
    To make a life.
    You gotta take care of your own
    And, I sure as hell ain’t grown
    I don’t know shit bout payin’ bills.
    Getting over hills life throws at me
    If I had lemons I’d pass ‘em
    Back.
    Fuck Lemonade.
    It’s the sugar I’m lacking.
    But just because I don’t know
    What being jumped on feels like,
    Don’t mean I don’t
    Know the struggle.
    Snuggle up to my teddy bear
    When I hear gunshots outside.
    3 a.m. and I can’t sleep cause
    Every day’s another fight.
    Taken away my right
    To marry.
    Join the military
    Just cause I’ve learned to love
    Myself and the others in my life.
    Trying to cope with addiction
    Both family members and mine.
    Finding time to finish school, church,
    Friends, making a chance in this world for myself.
    I’m trying to hard to be a good
    Daughter, friend, sister.
    I’m learning to adore myself
    And, someday, I hope it’ll all
    Turn out fine
    The way the rhymes do in
    Fairytales. I don’t want to be
    A princess, just a girl with dreams,
    Goals, a drive to make sure
    No more friends get
    Shot in the back and killed.
    Running from a man who knew
    No mercy.
    Bullets fly faster – the pleas of
    Forgiveness, apparently.
    Who says I don’t know pain?
    Rejection? Self-loathing?
    Who says I haven’t known
    Heartache and trouble? Depression
    And sacrifice?
    Poverty and restless nights?
    Don’t judge me based on where I do
    Or don’t come from.
    Judge me based on my aspirations,
    Interests, choices. Choices I liked.
    Not choices that were a paradox
    In themselves.
    Because you don’t always have
    Freedom in your choices.
    Hear our voices when we
    Rise from our grieving ashes
    Begging for a cause.
    Hear out begs for change when
    We grasp that contrary to
    Popular belief,
    Not all hope is lost.
    Hear our hopes and dreams
    That getting the hell out
    Of here is worth the cost
    That we’re gonna make a life
    Worth writing down someday
    That we’ll be remembered
    Through the fog.

  • HOW TO LOVE

    by PAULA

    Like a lioness on the prowl for prey,
    The blackout surrounds
    But sunrise must come.
    A star, flickering so
    Clearly above, love is unlike
    A figment of imagination.
    Unlike the gumdrop forest of Candyland
    With sugary tendrils
    Floating in the mist.
    It’s more like Chutes and Ladders
    Love
    Has ups and downs
    And sometimes it just had to start
    Over.
    Like the glass-tipped scales
    Of a pinecone in Mid-November
    True love endures.
    Through the trauma of winter,
    April’s dew
    Will
    Make the scene.
    A vicious cycle that prevails among the
    Most stubborn of storms.
    I
    Want a love
    Like that.

  • WHAT WORDS CAN TELL

    by PAULA

    Let the world know
    What lies within these walls
    Behind the bricks
    Beneath the sound
    Of constructions inevitable call
    Pennsylvania street beckons to me
    But the broken cameras
    Restrict the movement of
    Curious teens.
    The pages flip
    And the story continues
    to the square we’re trapped inside
    Four sides hidden by no lies
    But underestimated every time
    Take a look around
    Which can your words foretell
    Is it the wind under your words
    That link you to this tale?
    Lifeless trees will lose their leaves
    But cement bricks will bind us
    In a sea of people
    A whirlwind of trust
    My body rests before a crowd of angry eyes
    Despite my pathetic attempts to
    Understand the damage inside.
    I smile to show the rain will not drown me
    But the thunder and lightning will always surround me
    From this pencil comes the winter’s chill
    But I cling to these surroundings
    My thoughts ring still.

  • I WISH…

    by PAULA

    I wish my mom could move on with her life
    Forget the hardships, release the strife
    I wish I could grow just a bit more
    My eyes look down and touch the floor
    I wish I knew what my talents were
    The ideas in my head have started to stir
    I wish guys never caught my eye
    I’d have straight A’s
    I’d never cry
    And when I look back
    I wish I could fly
    I’d get away from this hell I call life
    I wish I still had red and black hair
    I wish I never cut it
    I wish no one had cared
    I wish to remove these scars
    From my wrists
    I wouldn’t be ashamed of the times
    I’d missed
    To regain the wishes of all that’s deprived
    I wish to never falter
    Or stutter in my stride
    I’m still steady wishing for a
    Newly repaired heart.


  • A DESIRE

    by PAULA

    I’m gonna state a desire
    We need to address
    We’ve been building new structures
    My current capacity won’t allow
    So, to alleviate the costs, let’s evaluate tradition.
    It was the epiphany to become more
    That contributed to revenue were tangled in.
    There are mandatory fees we must pay, however.
    That we wouldn’t exist without.
    It’s in conjunction with the consistency
    We chase.
    Lectures draw plans outta maintenance.
    Plans that have been in the works
    For ages to come.
    It’s been brought to the forefront
    To discuss the potential
    We’re currently in the midst
    Of, at least, the silent phase.
    No public announcement.
    No final decision has been made.
    A possibility has been thought
    But, we’ll evaluate the situation
    When it arrives.
    For now, relieve some of the pressure.
    Let’s keep it inside.