The pulse of modern life is economic and the fundamental principle of economic production is individual independence. Its effect has penetrated ethics. Consequently the independence of the individual in the ethical field and the independence of property in the economic field bear witness to each other, thus reaffirming the theory [of such interaction]. Because of this [interaction], social mores and material culture have taken a great step forward.
In China, the Confucianists have based their teachings on their ethical norms. sons and wives possess neither personal individuality nor personal property. Fathers and elder brothers bring up their sons and younger brothers and are in turn supported by them. It is said in chapter thirty of the Book ef Rites that “While parents are living, the son dares not regard his person or property as his own.” [27:14] This is absolutely not the way to personal independence ….
In all modern constitutional states, whether monarchies or republics, there are political parties. Those who engage in party activities all express their spirit of independent conviction. They go their own way and need not agree with their fathers or husbands. When people are bound by the Confucian teachings of filial piety and obedience to the point of the son not deviating from the father’s way even three years after his death1 and the woman obeying not only her father and husband but also her son, how can they form their own political party and make their own choice? The movement of women’s participation in politics is also an aspect of women’s life in modern civilization. When they are bound by the Confucian teaching that “To be a woman means to submit,” that “The wife’s words should not travel beyond her own apartment,” and that “A woman does not discuss affairs outside the home,” would it not be unusual if they participated in politics?
In the West some widows choose to remain single because they are strongly attached to their late husbands and sometimes because they prefer a single life; they have nothing to do with what is called the chastity of widowhood. Widows who remarry are not despised by society at all. On the other hand, in the Chinese teaching of decorum, there is the doctrine of “no remarriage after the husband’s death.” It is considered to be extremely shameful and unchaste for a woman to serve two husbands or a man to serve two rulers. The Book of Rites also prohibits widows from wailing at night [XXVII: 21] and people from being friends with sons of widows. [IX:21] For the sake of their family reputation, people have forced their daughters-in-law to remain widows. These women have had no freedom and have endured a most miserable life. Year after year these many promising young women have lived a physically and spiritually abnormal life. All this is the result of Confucian teachings of decorum [or rites].
In today’s civilized society, social intercourse between men and women is a common practice. Some even say that because women have a tender nature and can temper the crudeness of man, they are necessary in public or private gatherings. It is not considered improper even for strangers to sit or dance together once they have been introduced by the host. In the way of Confucian teaching, however, “Men and women do not sit on the same mat,” “Brothers-and sisters-in-law do not exchange inquiries about each other,” “Married sisters do not sit on the same mat with brothers or eat from the same dish,” “Men and women do not know each other’s name except through a matchmaker and should have no social relations or show affection until after marriage presents have been exchanged,” “Women must cover their faces when they go out,” “Boys and girls seven years or older do not sit or eat together,” “Men and women have no social relations except through a matchmaker and do not meet until after marriage presents have been exchanged,” and “Except in religious sacrifices, men and women do not exchange wine cups.” Such rules of decorum are not only inconsistent with the mode of life in Western society; they cannot even be observed in today’s China.
Western women make their own living in various professions such as that of lawyer, physician, and store employee. But in the Confucian way, “In giving or receiving anything, a man or woman should not touch the other’s hand,” “A man does not talk about affairs inside [the household] and a woman does not talk about affairs outside [the household],” and “they do not exchange cups except in sacrificial rites and funerals.” “A married woman is to obey” and the husband is the standard of the wife. Thus the wife is naturally supported by the husband and needs no independent livelihood.
A married woman is at first a stranger to her parents-in-law. She has only affection but no obligation toward them. In the West parents and children usually do not live together; and daughters-in-law, particularly, have no obligation to serve parents-in-law. But in the way of Confucius, a woman is to “revere and respect them and never to disobey day or night,” “A woman obeys, that is, obeys her parents-in-law,” “A woman serves her parent-in-law as she serves her own parents,” she “never should disobey or be lazy in carrying out the orders of parents and parents-in-law.” “If a man is very fond of his wife, but his parents do not like her, she should be divorced .” (In ancient times there were many such cases, like that of Lu Yii [1125-1210].) “Unless told to retire to her own apartment, a woman does not do so, ·and if she has an errand to do, she must get permission from her parents-in-law.” This is the reason why the tragedy of cruelty to daughters-in-law has never ceased in Chinese society.
According to Western customs, fathers do not discipline grownup sons but leave them to the law of the country and the control of society. But in the way of Confucius, “When one’s parents are angry and not pleased and beat him until he bleeds, he does not complain but instead arouses in himself the feelings of reverence and filial piety.”18 This is the reason why in China there is the saying, “One has to die if his father wants him to, and the minister has to perish if his ruler wants him to” …
Confucius lived in a feudal age. The ethics he promoted is the ethics of the feudal age. The social mores he taught and even his own mode of living were teachings and modes of a feudal age. The political institutions he advocated were those of a feudal age. The objectives, ethics, social norms, mode of living, and political institutions did not go beyond the privilege and prestige of a few rulers and aristocrats and had nothing to do with the happiness of the great masses. How can this be shown? In the teachings of Confucius, the most important element in social ethics and social life is the rules of decorum and the most serious thing in government is punishment. In chapter one of the Book of Rites, it is said that “The rules of decorum do not go down to the common people and the penal statutes do not go up to great officers.” (I:35] Is this not solid proof of the [true] spirit of the way of Confucius and the spirit of the feudal age?